Holy Shit, I Forgot About the Final Blog Post

I'm undecided as to whether or not I will be continuing with this blog.  I may add to it from time to time, but I like to write on paper.  I like to scribble shit out when I don't like it.  I still think I'm pretty indifferent about the whole blog scene.  I think it's cool to have such informal medium with a massive, growing audience, but I don't really know if I enjoy it.  I won't know until I'm through being required to contribute.  I tend to focus more on fewer, more intimate interactions.  I like reading groups and smoke circles (most of the time they're the same event with my crowd).  I like to see peoples' face when they talk to me.  I hope that doesn't mean I'm a serial killer or something--I know the answer to that anyway.  I just seem to require more in an encounter.  I am an in-person kind of guy.  When lines are reasonable, I avoid the self-checkout lines.  I have never and will never "tweet."  I will always piss my friends off by not responding to an invite on Facebook, simply because I will not have seen it.  I really have nothing against the burgeoning online community.  In fact, it is my hope, that one day, this online society and global communication will replace religion.  It could happen, you can imagine.  It's easy, if you try. 

Haha, wow.  That's why I don't know about the blog thing--I feel alright saying any old thing. 

And so does everyone else.

Enneagram Make-Up Post

<div align="center"> <table style="color: black; background: #eeeeee"border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2"> <tr> <td bgcolor="#eeeeee"> <div align="center"> Enneagram Test Results <table style="color: black; background: #dddddd" border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="4" bgcolor="#dddddd"> <tr> <td>Type 1 </td> <td>Perfectionism</td> <td width="50"> ||||||||||||</td> <td width="30">46%</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Type 2</td> <td> Helpfulness</td> <td width="50">||||||||||||</td> <td width="30">50%</td> </tr> <tr> <td> Type 3</td> <td> Image Focus</td> <td width="50"> ||||||||||||||||</td> <td width="30"> 66%</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Type 4</td> <td>Hypersensitivity</td> <td width="50"> ||||||||||||||</td> <td width="30"> 58%</td> </tr> <tr> <td> Type 5</td> <td> Detachment</td> <td width="50"> ||||||||||||||||||</td> <td width="30"> 74%</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Type 6</td> <td>Anxiety</td> <td width="50"> ||||||||||||||</td> <td width="30"> 54%</td> </tr> <tr> <td> Type 7</td> <td> Adventurousness</td> <td width="50"> ||||||||||||||||</td> <td width="30"> 66%</td> </tr> <tr> <td> Type 8</td> <td>Aggressiveness</td> <td width="50"> ||||||||||||||||||</td> <td width="30"> 74%</td> </tr> <tr> <td> Type 9</td> <td>Calmness</td> <td width="50">||||||</td> <td width="30"> 26%</td> </tr> </table> </div> </td> </tr> </table> <a href="http://similarminds.com/enneagram_word.html">Take Free Enneagram Word Test</a><br><font size="1"><a href="http://similarminds.com">personality tests by similarminds.com</a></font></div>


So, 9types says I am split between 5 and 8.  I guess this makes me a "thinking leader."  I suppose this is a fairly accurate description of my personality.  I am usually pretty consumed in thought.  A Thinker is supposed to spend a lot of time trying to understand the world.  This is especially accurate for me.  I have great difficulty dealing with the unfairness that plagues most of our existence. I tremble indignation at every injustice, me and Che.  This mindset works simultaneously with my second, equally measured trait.  A Leader is supposed feel that the world is unjust and that strong people like me are supposed to "defend the weak."  I really think this is true of me.  I have lost more than one relationship because of my inability to stand aside when I could speak up to "injustice" of most any kind.  I don't like feeling guilty.  I think these descriptions are pretty accurate of my personality.  I hate to be so easily categorized, but I guess this simple little quiz was enough to suss me out.

I thought the directions for equilibrium were pretty interesting.  I guess I need to focus on myself instead of controlling others and really observe and analyze the world in order to be at peace.  Well, it sounds like good advice to me.  Here's to all the money I just saved on a therapist. 

Didn't I, my dear?

I haven't read much this semester, but I have been on a frantic search for some new quality music for the last year or two.  I had become all too rooted in listening to only music from my ipod. Then, a couple months ago, with the addition of Pandora Internet Radio (if you haven't tried it or a site like it, make plans) into my life, I found all kinds of good stuff.  Along with being reminded of how much I used to love Citizen Cope and Gov't Mule, I was introduced to some nice young Londoners who perform under the band name Mumford & Sons.  My title is from the refrain of their hit "Little Lion Man."  I like this song, but the rest of the tracks on their "Sigh No More" album are where I really found a reason to keep listening.

I borrowed the album from a hipster friend who always has the latest music that no one has heard of. While Mumford & Sons are a little more well-known than most of her collection, they have a sound that lacks that mainstream punch or pop or whatever it is that makes Lady Gaga and T-Pain sound like they do. I added it to my iPod and proceeded to bask in 4-piece (4 band members playing 4 instruments) magnificence. They have a melancholy tone that pulls on your must intimate of emotions. Their blistering strum patterns and bittersweet melodies produce an unrivaled sound in the world of folk-grass. And then there's the vocals.  As a one-time vocal performance major, I am often let down by the vocals of folk-type groups, where singing usually takes backseat to the instrumental focus.  The voices of Mumford & Sons blend something fierce and the harmony is just plain kick-ass.  Also, there stuff is fun as hell to play.  I really think these young musicians have formed a powerful and unique ensemble that will be making beautiful music for years to come.

Hindsight's 20/20

I have now experienced the end of nine college semesters, six of which were here at the University of Montana.  For me, the trouble is knowing that you can, in fact, completely lose motivation, drop out for a semester or two, re-register and head back to classes.  This is not a good thing to know.  It's a worse thing to practice. 

I'm nine semesters in and I'm only mildly confident in my major of choice (Ecology).  The only thing I am sure of is my need for a Bachelor's degree in something, since they're being given out like fuckin french fries these days.  With all the crazy things we've dreamed up for people to do with their time on Earth, asking someone to choose at or near my age just seems cruel.

However, now that the end of the semester is upon us, I feel every part of me that has matured at least a little since high school telling me what every college student needs to hear when motivation is hard to find.  It's only another couple of weeks, suck it up and enjoy it before you miss it.  Personally, I have encountered several points in my life where I wished I had slowed down a bit and enjoyed the process for what it was.  I don't want to have to encounter this feeling again merely with hindsight.  I've made it a personal goal to really just buckle down, grind it out and have a good time doing it.  I think it's all about realizing just how you're going to look back at this time in your life and acting accordingly.